Linderville

First Day of School (Third Grade)

Well it's the first day of school for Madison.  I'm still not exactly sure what happened to the summer, but it's pretty much gone.  We ended it with a bang with some friends over lobster (we are in Maine :)). 

Anyway, its 5 in the morning and I'm already wanting to put the coffee on, but I'd better let Will sleep a little longer.  Unfortunately for him Madison got the I get up at the buttcrack of dawn gene from me.

I heard her get up earlier (really should have thought about having our room near the bathroom when we bought our house), and I know she's up in her room right now with all kinds of the same feelings that I'm having right now.

She's nervous, excited, and anxious, as I am, but both of us for different reasons.  I had a love/hate relationship with school.  I loved it because it provided me an escape from a lot of not so good things going on in my life.  I also loved learning new things and still do.  I could be a professional student if only someone else would pay the bills.  I didn't the people at school.  Everyone seemed to fit into some sort of little group and I never did.  Sure I made good grades, but I was no prodigy.  I had a few friends here and there, but not the way most people look back at school and remember.  I know part of the reason was that I went to so many schools I've lost count. 

So I'm nervous and anxious about school starting today for Madison.  But for me its because I never want her to have any of the feelings that I did for school.  At least none of the bad ones.  It's hard to protect your child from something you have no control over, and that bugs me the most.

Mother's Day

I've been reading since about Friday all things Mother's Day, obviously since it's today.  But for me it's probably the first Mother's Day that I've really thought about it in different terms.

I mean it's no news flash to anyone who knows me that my mother and I have not always been close.  We didn't have a major fight at any one point in our lives or anything, just circumstances, both in and beyond our control.  That relationship is getting better as we both get older, as most of those mother/daughter relationships do.  And I'm ever so grateful that we're both here to work on it.

What I've really been thinking about a lot today though is those times I do complain to my friends or something about my mother or about Madison.  And what I forget about are those people who either don't have their mothers with them anymore to "complain" about or those around me who haven't had the great joy of having a child to become a mother.  I forget that this may be a sad weekend for them.  Those who so deperately miss their mothers and those who have tried everything under the sun to become one.

So I pledged that today those friends and family that I know would be in my thoughts as well today, hoping that a little of that will help them get through today a little better.  I've cherished every moment that Madison wanted to spend with me today (because we all know it's becoming her choice and not mine :) ).  Even if sitting outside to read with snacks only lasted 10 minutes because it was not fun to read with the sun in your eyes Mommy.

I am learning more and more every day just how lucky I am to be a mom.

Seeing Red

I know the title may confuse you at first, but this post is not about being angry.

Madison's 8th birthday is at the end of February and we've already started planning what kind of party she wants.  Of course every year her birthday also makes me feel older, but in a good way.  This year though one thing is sort of sticking out just a little to me. 

It's the first year that she doesn't want some sort of theme to her party.  No characters or anything.  She wants all of her napkins and plates and such to be red, which happens to be my favorite color.  Also what better time of the year to get stuff like that.  Her birthday is the 24th, so all of the valentine items should be on sale just in time for me to get what she wants.

Initially she wanted a chocolate cake with red icing, but has changed her mind for chocolate icing.  She is such my child.  :)  What warms my heart about this cake is that she wants me to make it for her again just like last year.  She told me last year that she wanted one that I made, not from the store.

Also this year, her party will be at our house with some girls possibly sleeping over.  This should be very interesting.  Thankfully, I have a couple of friends who have volunteered to stay with me and lend a hand.  Will has miraculously been invited over to another friends house to hang out :).  Not sure why he wouldn't want to be in a house with several 7-8 year olds.

Anyway, I'll keep you updated on the progress of the party situation.  Madison has apparently made her own list of things she wants.  And like I said, she is such my daughter, and I can't wait to see what she's asked for.

Happy New Year

Happy New Year everyone.  Well the snow has turned to freezing rain but Will and Madison are still planning to try and ski a little towards the end of the week.

Looking back on this year and everything that it had in store for us, I'm just thankful beyond words that Will is able to take Madison skiing.  I still worry every day to some degree, but thankfully its not consuming my entire thought process.

Will has started a new job now and we are waiting for the Coast Guard to complete processing his retirement.  He seems to really like his new job, although I know somewhere in the back of his mind his heart is still in the Coast Guard.  He loved it and wanted to continue to do it for his entire career.  But we have both tried to look at the positive side of it all.  We don't ever have to move again unless we want to do so.  We love it here.  We love all that Maine has to offer.  Madison's school system is amazing.  I have a good job that I love and the community we live in couldn't be better.

I think that's what I love about New Year's though.  We plan and plan and yet we have no idea what the year actually has in store for us.  Sometimes I think its funny that we even make plans.  Nothing ever seems to work out quite like you planned, but somehow no matter how off course it gets, it all seems to work out in the end.  I can definitely say that that's the one thing that I've learned from 2006; things may not work out like you planned, they may work out to be better.

Here's to 2007!  I'm hoping for another great year.

Being sick...well it sucks

Madison was sick for three days of last week and of course we worried about her being able to enjoy Christmas.  All was well for Christmas Day, until midnight last night when she was up.  I thought she felt warm but couldn't be sure.

She was rambling on and on about something that I couldn't make out.  She sleep walks and talks in her sleep, so this is nothing unusual.  We both went back to bed after I took her upstairs.

Well this morning, BAM, all over again.  High fever, horrible cough that emerged from the regular one of the last couple of days.  Her eyes are so red underneath she looks like someone hit her.

I know she really doesn't feel good when she asks to take medicine.  This coming from the child who doesn't believe that french fries are potatoes.  She thinks we are just trying to trick  her into eating mashed potatoes.

So off to the doctor we'll go today.  Hopefully to put an end to this.  At least until the next time. :)

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas everyone!!  Ours started at promptly 4:45 am, which would have normally caused Will and I to groan, but since he had to leave for work at 6:45 am, we didn't want to be rushed.  I say that like Madison wouldn't want to rip into everything in about 30 seconds, but amazingly she didn't.

Madison's face was alive with all the wonder, suprise and excitement you can imagine.  And yet no matter how many pictures I take, they never seem to capture that sheer joy.  It never ceases to amaze me.  Although this year I wanted to bottle it up and save it for the years to come because I fear this may be the last year we see it.  Knowing the kind of person she is, I know she'll embrace the Christmas Spririt for what it truly means in years to come, but I still can't help but be a little sad at the thought of not "believing" in Santa anymore.  I know that it's more of me not wanting her to grow up so fast and yet not being able to do anything about it.

We are looking forward to a quiet day spent with some friends and waiting for Will to get off from work so he can join us.  I want to wish everyone a very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.